Last week I had a client consultation during which she started explaining how she likes being athletic and outdoorsy, but also likes playing with hair and makeup. She was almost apologetic when she said “I’m not like a tomboy, but. . . I don’t know, I’m just weird that way I guess. . .” So I’m going to tell you what I told her.
No apologies or disclaimers necessary. How many of us spent our teenage years trying to “define ourselves” and then spend the rest of our lives feeling caged in that definition? No need, Love. Just be whatever / whoever you want from moment to moment. You get to choose. Over and over again.
I can like power tools and building a thing myself one day, and the next day I can hate it and sit on the couch while someone else does it. You can love makeup and still go out fresh faced. You can be a loving mom, a tough business lady, and a soft sexy lover too.
The caveat (because every coin has 2 sides) the caveat is that in the Infinite Buffet of Human Beingness, there are options we might consider unsavory. Monster, liar, cheater, and such are also on the buffet. Being aware of them gives you empathy. A person’s gotta be in a real bad place to choose those. And you are lucky that you can choose differently. The Infinite Buffet means you are responsible for your choosing.
When someone comes to my studio, I ask “How would you like to see yourself?” and Who Would you like to be? Forest Goddess, Gardener, Superhero? Happy family, powerful professional, alluring vixen? Because I know whatever you say is in there, inside you. You don’t actually need me to be it anymore than you need a personal trainer to get fit. It just helps to have a guide!
Go be Infinite. Choose who and how you want to be freely, from one moment to the next. And never apologize for all your dazzling facets!
The Lie of Before and After